A blog by Nadia Hewstone.
ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder) is often misunderstood, especially when it comes to women. We’re often overlooked, misdiagnosed, or told that our behaviours are simply “too much.” But what if our creativity, energy, and rebellious nature are not weaknesses but signs of a different type of leadership? Reflecting on my childhood, my leadership journey, and the challenges I faced, I’ve come to realise that being a female leader with ADHD is not only a struggle but also a strength.
Childhood: The Signs of a Leader
From a young age, I was always busy. My family used to call me “Walkie Talkie” because I couldn’t stop talking. I was always up early, bursting with energy and ideas, with an insatiable curiosity about the world around me. I remember creating a dolls’ carry cot out of a shredded wheat box. This wasn’t just a random act of creativity—it was a sign of my imaginative and resourceful nature, even as a child.
However, my boundless energy didn’t always serve me well. At school, I often found myself in trouble for things I couldn’t quite understand. I’d incite the other children to do rebellious things, like once convincing my entire science class to throw glue sticks at the ceiling. Looking back, I realize it wasn’t about mischief for mischief’s sake—it was my impulsivity, my inability to sit still, and the constant need for stimulation that caused me to act out.
My nana would often say, “Your mum made you bold on purpose,” but back then, we had no idea what ADHD was. There was no diagnosis, no understanding of the neurological reasons behind my behaviour. All I knew was that I felt different—driven by a force I couldn’t control or fully comprehend.
Leadership: The ADHD Advantage
As I grew older, my ADHD manifested itself in entrepreneurial instincts. Even as a child, I showed early signs of leadership. I remember setting up a little “café” on my estate using scrap wood, hammers, nails, and whatever materials I could find. I didn’t know it at the time, but I was already honing the skills that would define my leadership style later in life.
Fast forward to adulthood, and those same traits—energy, creativity, impulsivity—became assets in my career. As a Headteacher, I became known as an entrepreneurial leader. I hustled for resources, I found innovative ways to overcome the constraints that come with school leadership, and I always looked for new approaches to make things work. I wasn’t afraid to think outside the box or challenge the status quo, even when it seemed like a long shot.
My hyper-focus, a hallmark of ADHD, also became a strength. While others might have gotten bogged down by distractions, I could dive deep into a project and give it my all, sometimes for hours on end. This focus has allowed the schools I led to achieve extraordinary progress. The energy and drive I put into my work had a direct impact on the teams I led and the students we served.
The Challenges: Struggling with the Label
However, being a female leader with ADHD comes with unique challenges. There’s a certain shame that accompanies ADHD, particularly when it comes to the impulsive decision-making, the tendency to say things without thinking, or even my occasional habit of telling tall tales “for fun.” These behaviours, when misunderstood, can be seen as unprofessional or even manipulative, but they are simply part of the ADHD package.
As I entered my 40s, I experienced burnout in a way I had never anticipated. The constant need to keep up, the emotional exhaustion, and the never-ending pursuit of new ideas caught up with me. But despite the burnout, I was still driven. It was only then that I began to understand that my ADHD wasn’t something to overcome but something to manage. I started working on strategies to balance my energy, to find ways to rest without feeling guilty, and to accept that I couldn’t always be “on.”
One of the most difficult challenges I’ve faced as a female leader with ADHD is the perception that I am “too much.” Whether it’s my intensity, my ideas, or my relentless pursuit of goals, it can be overwhelming to those around me. Women with ADHD often face the stereotype of being chaotic, disorganised, or “unhinged,” when in reality, we are simply wired differently. It’s not about being “too much”—it’s about being *too much for the norms of a world that doesn’t understand us*.
Embracing Unapologetically Me
The truth is, women with ADHD aren’t seen as cool. We aren’t the easily digestible, “chill” type that people often expect in leadership roles. Instead, we are dynamic, energetic, and sometimes unpredictable. But we also have a unique set of strengths that can drive meaningful change, whether in the classroom, the workplace, or in any other field.
ADHD, for me, isn’t just a disorder—it’s a different way of being. I’m learning to embrace it rather than apologise for it. Women with ADHD need diagnoses, not as a label, but as a tool to understand ourselves better and develop strategies to manage our energy. I want to spend time exploring what it means to be unapologetically me—embracing my ADHD as part of my identity and my leadership journey.
Ultimately, it’s about finding balance. The world may not always understand, but that doesn’t mean I can’t succeed, lead, and thrive.
